Sunday, December 21, 2014

Sunday Photo Post

Sort of the best wife ever: texted Ben this picture while he was in bed this morning.
It's fine for people to fall asleep while trying to post their blog on their phone.  Epic fail.  Woke up in the middle of the night and it never got posted.  This is why.
Maya's favorite Christmas song of all time.

Went down to Maya's bedroom to wrap Christmas gifts and ended up fixing her TV.  For months, the kids claimed it was broken and I just kept putting off calling someone to come look at it.  LOVE when stuff like this works out.  Oh, and gifts are wrapped.
Another car wash for Ben's car.
CFNE Staff holiday party at Trina's.  I love Yankee Swaps.  I ended up getting the gift that I brought: a selfie stick!
Ben giving Cheryl her Employee of the Year gift: a new iPhone 6!

My contribution: "Paleo" chocolate chip peanut butter and jelly cookies.
Kristin Burman (sp?) sent kettle bell cookies for us!

Saturday Photo Post

Ben, his Dad, and Harry just killin' it at the CFNE Holiday party.
Jamie.  It's normal.  At a bar.  Totally normal.
Sent this to Montoya.  Missin' him :(
Solo at the car wash with Ben's car.
Still.  3 fingers.  May never do the thumb.
Jonah's last basketball game of 2014.
Bode: "Bye bye, basketball!"
Is that a normal size foot for an infant?
No pressure, Katie.  15 seconds left, down by 1, 70 game winning streak.  She made it and they went into overtime.  Unfortunately, they ended up losing the game...but, put up an unbelievable fight.  Love this team.
Holiday party at Geoff Leard's family's house.  Love the Bode smile pics.
Total buds :)

Saturday, December 20, 2014

I'm A Dumb Jock

"Look how filthy you are!  March up to the bathroom right now and start LICKING yourself!"
See Maya all the way on the left in blue?  This was right before she sunk her first ever 3 pointer on the Varsity Basketball team at Nobles.  MA GIRL.
Maya's team and her Dad who happens to be the coach of her team.
So, we're still on the 3 finger thing.
I signed up to bring snacks for Maya's team tonight.  Kill Cliff and Fuel For Fire both donated these goodies to fuel her and her teammates.  They took this down in between their two tournament games...with a few boxes of pizza.  Perfect.
Yup, ladies.  This is what I get to look at when I go out on a date.
Pre-gamed for the CFNE Holiday Party at our place with the Giorgio's!  Ben cooked us up some special cocktails: Kill Cliff margaritas.  WINNING.
My father hates when I say this, but I am totally ok admitting that I'm just really not all that "smart".

It's not that I'm all-around dumb, but I get confused about more things than I should, I will full-on sprint away from any conversation surrounding politics, I get totally overwhelmed by scientific lingo, I have to read the same sentence 10 times before it has any chance of sinking in, I sweat through layers of shirts when I have to take a test, and forget about trying to tell me a joke because you're going to have to spell out the punch line...in various ways...before I can even come close to understanding why it's a joke in the first place.

I really hit my peak non-smartness when it comes to numbers, though.  Which is entirely inconvenient and highly frustrating considering it's a huge part of being a CrossFit athlete.  I'm really not even sure how it is that Ben deals with it all the time.  Because it's an all the time sort of thing.  Not to mention how my teammates find the patience in the middle of competition to not want to completely remove me from the team because I can't count my own reps or add up the amount of weight on a barbell.

The only good thing about me being so unbright is that I will more than often be trying to work on some heavy lifts and will suddenly realize that I'm lifting 5 or 10 pounds more than I thought I was.  Or, I'll do entire workouts 15 pounds heavier than I'm supposed to.

I spend much of my athletic time being frustrated with why I'm so much slower and more worse than everyone around me, but it softens the blow when I find out it's because I'm involuntarily scaling up the load, reps, or rounds.

So, I guess my lack of intelligence helps to make me a better athlete.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

My 5 Things That Make Everything Better

Maya and I kicked off the morning watching a hip-hop aerobics class on TV.  You can't even imagine the comments coming out of our mouths.
I used to be an aerobics instructor...for almost 15 years.  I even made my mother an aerobics video for a Christmas present one year so she could "do aerobics with me" everyday when I was in college.  I used to own the Reebok Step; not like I had one at home, but "own" like I was the queen of the Step.  Don't even get me near a double-Step set-up.  I used to teach Hip Hop Aerobics as my work-study job at Stonehill College.  Killin' it with my microphone.  Those were the glory days of staring at yourself for an entire hour in a full-length mirror.
The Abdominal Snowman
Jonah woke up early this morning because he got it in his head that he wanted to make pancakes for breakfast.  I'm sure that had nothing to do with my mother being here over the weekend.
However, I our fire alarm went of, maybe, 20 times over the course of 20 minutes.  Poor Bode and Harley were still in bed sleeping when it went off the first time.  I swore the neighbors were going to call the cops on us.  That thing is SO loud, and I have zero idea of how to turn it off.  Can you even imagine how many bad words came out of my mouth this morning?  The only time that thing goes off is when we make pancakes.  The last time was when Katrin was here and she insisted on making pancakes every morning.  What I really loved was Jonah going, "Well, it doesn't go off when Grandma makes pancakes."
I am such a hog.  Here's my plate full of 3 fried eggs, white rice, and bacon for breakfast. 
Inhaled it.  And, then when straight to the gym to have some chicken salad and a Quest Bar.  I'm disgusting.  Total hog.
Only car at the car wash on a rainy Thursday morning.  Figures.
Maya getting her butt handed to her during The Fish Game at Ben's 8:30 class this morning.
Bode got the "Mr. Congeniality" award at playgroup for this term.  Total baller.
I am just annihilating my Christmas shopping right now, so I'm going to make this quick in the hopes of not losing momentum.

Whenever I have stuff that has to get done that I'm not psyched about doing, I dig through my brain for my little list of things that make everything better.  It's like magic.  My perspective on whatever the "chore" is magically changes and I sort of look forward to it.

I used to use this when it was comment writing time for the athletes I coached at Nobles.  I definitely use it any time I am gearing up to paint a room that I know is going to be a multi-step process.  And, hands down, I use this stuff when I've gotta' dial it in and plough through Christmas Hell Week (which we're in the thick of right now).

#1.  Wine
Doesn't have to be good wine, either.  It's just gotta' be red, a cool looking label, and poured into some super cool ceramic mug or goblet.  I'm big on presentation.  Don't judge me.  I'm not getting wasted over here or anything.  Growing up, I just always used to dream about the days I could sit around my house sipping on a glass of wine.  It's weird, but if you day dreamed about the same thing, you know what I mean.

#2.  Tunes
I firmly believe there is a genre of music for every moment/mood.  And, it changes like the wind.  When I'm doing the drive to and from Nobles, I cycle through Eric Church, Missy Elliot, Nas, Dave Matthews, Taylor Swift, Mark Ronson, Big Tymers...the list is sort of endless.  Music sets the mood, and the mood is everything.

#3.  Attire
I don't care if another human being so much as lays an eye on me when I'm sitting down to write this blog.  When I write, I need to be comfortable.  And, not like "I've totally given up and the fact that I have four children is a fair excuse to look like a homeless person", but it's more about a super soft shirt, cute socks, pants that I can spread out in, and being warm.  I hate feeling cold.  And, if I had even the slightest need for glasses, I'd be wearing them because I think it would make me look and feel smarter.

#4.  Tea
I really don't like tea all that much, but I wish I did.  It seems so much more sophisticated than coffee and, again, I feel like smart/artsy/grounded people drink tea.  But, I'm not all that smart, I'm in my jock phase (my artistic phase will come when I can no longer be a competitive athlete), and I'm sure as hell not grounded.  I'm more like floating around somewhere in the Milky Way at all times.  When I was pregnant, I went through a period of time where I didn't like coffee and was constantly sipping on tea.  Well, since I have no interest in being pregnant again, I'll just say that I wish I could do the tea thing because it would fit into this whole line-up nicely.

#5.  Good snacks
If I had to have one go-to snack that I always look forward to it would definitely be the popcorn EC, Maya and I make.  EC got me a popcorn maker for a gift once and it's like the gift that keeps on giving.  We do regular kernels, grass fed butter, sea salt, and coconut oil.  A little bowl of that by my side and I'm good to go for just about anything.

So, all of that, minus the tea (that doesn't even really make sense...even to me...and, I'm the one that wrote it), and I can enjoy getting some work done.

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Is Your Toothbrush Area Clean?

It's totally normal, guys.  Really.
Misconcession: "I said get a large COLA!"
Filling spice jars: I will do just about anything to put off wrapping presents and sending out the rest of my Christmas cards.
Bode and his girl, Emma.
Watching Jonah's CrossFit Middle School class.  I think Bode needs to start wearing more stripes.
This kid is SOOOO Asian it's insane.
Middle school class gettin' after Fran today.  WHAT?
Max and Harley are going to the prom together this year.  You can't even imagine how many kisses he gave this little girl on the top of her head during their little snuggle sesh.
I think Jonah's actually starting to enjoy, not "love" but "enjoy", basketball.
Believe it or not...actually, I don't think this is very hard to believe...but, years ago I went through a pretty intense feng shui phase.  One of the things I remember from that whole practice is that if certain things aren't kept clean, in good order, or free of clutter you will end up suffering in other areas of your life that you wouldn't normally see any direct relationship between.

Ever since then, I've become a little obsessive about keeping on top of certain things that are very easy to ignore or overlook.

For example, take the toothbrush "area".  We use one of those electric toothbrushes that stay in a little stand while the toothbrush heads lay in this sort of tray.  Because of the main part getting all wet when used and rinsed off afterwards, the stand and the bottom of the main part get pretty slimy if you don't clean or at least rinse it regularly.  The tray is the same deal, but it's an even bigger issue because that's the part that goes in your mouth.  Think about it: if you don't put the effort into regularly cleaning those pieces of equipment, you might as well not even bother brushing your teeth because all that slime is just making it's way into your mouth.  And, that's just nasty.

And, yes, for the record, I am horrified when I catch a glimpse of other peoples' toothbrush "areas" when they are clearly neglected.  It's a terrible part of your life to let get all gross like that.

Another one that I think we all let go way too long is the inside of your microwave.  That thing is such a pain in the butt to keep clean: the walls, the ceiling, the plate, under the plate.  It's all just a nuisance.  But, it doesn't change the fact that it should remain clean.  It's what you are exposing the food you're about to put into your body to and it should be as clean as the plate you're about to eat off of.  Just throw a paper towel or something on top of the bowl to keep it from splattering all over; it's one of those things that the amount of effort it takes to cover up is nothing compared to what you'll have to do if you let it explode in there.

Microwaves are a whole concept I don't understand anyways.  But, we'll save that for another entire blog post.

Bathroom mirrors should be clean.  Period.  Again, it's sort of a pain to keep up with especially when ever family member in your house insists on spitting their toothpaste slobber onto the mirror instead of the sink where it's supposed to end up.  But, if you just leave a paper towel roll and bottle of cleaner under the sink it's right there and you can look into a clear mirror all the time instead of the dried up spit.

Finally, I really believe that your laundry room/area should be kept organized and clean at all times.  It's where your clothes go to get clean, meaning it shouldn't be a place that you just dump things and shove bottles and containers of detergents in any open spot.  I think things should always be stocked and labeled so there's no question where something belongs.  If that space is messy and dirty, you can assume your clothes are ending up in the same situation...even after you've cleaned them.

Well, that should do it for now.  I'm sure to have pissed off a majority of the readers with that little rant.

And, as Susan Weiss and I talked about today, even if you think you don't care...you do.  So, go take care of your business.

You'll feel better about yourself.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Ben Bergeron: The Ultimate Christmas Coach


I strategically tried to filter this as much as I could because it is so totally disgusting: the clump of hair I had to dig out of the kids bathtub drain.  Guess whose 14 year old long brown hair it is.  I cannot believe my father had to do this repeatedly throughout the time I grew up living in his house.  I almost threw up in my mouth during the process.  Thanks a bunch, Maya.
This is the scene this morning after I caught my ex-husband feeding marshmallows to Bode behind my back.
He claimed Bode pulled them out on his own, but I know how badly he wants to sabotage this child's nutrition regimen.
Just a kid kickin' off the day with his remote control fire truck, a container of hard-boiled eggs, and 3 coasters that he would stack on top of the fire truck and spin it around so fast that they'd get launched in every which direction.  Over and over and over again.
Maybe the greatest day ever: a digger pulled up right in front of our house...that was digging a hole out in our back yard.
This whole thing launched Mike Giorgio up to superhero status in Bode's book because it was Mike's digger.  I love the second Mike opened Bode's door, Bode starts yelling, "MIKE! MIKE! MIKE!"
Oh my God.  I think I've turned into that girl.  The kind of girl that let's crumbs linger in her back seat for over a week without doing anything about it.  For the record, the moment I hit publish (in about 90 seconds) I am marching my sorry self out into the garage to vaccuum and Armor-All that damn car until it is sparkling like Beyonce's ass.
Bode begged me to take a picture of Roar.  How can I say no to that?
I don't think Bode in any way is a distraction while Ben's trying to coach his 8:30 athletes.  That child is going to be able to identify a closed hip angle before he gets to Kindergarten.
A little sneak peak at the train table my Dad built for Bode's Christmas present this year.  I'm sure it will look just like that 60 minutes after he gets his paws on it.
Sometimes nothing can get done until you give yourself a quick manicure.  I can't focus unless my nails are trimmed, coiffed (I have always wanted to use that word in a sentence and have never had the opportunity), and adequately moisturized.  Now, I'm can vacuum that car in peace.
Fine.  I'll admit it.  Against my will.  But, I'll admit it.  I am letting the holidays stress me out.

I secretly love it when people say, "Heather, I don't know how you do it all: the brown bag drawings, the blog, all of the kids, your training."  And, I really love saying, "PLEASE!  Are you crazy?  I'm sitting around trying to figure out what to do with all of my time!"

Well, here's the honest truth.  If you say that to me these days, and I say that back to you, I'm politely lying just to avoid a potential meltdown that would shut down Ben Bergeron's little "Complaint Free Zone".

I called Ben yesterday to see if he wanted to take the family to The Millis Wonderland, but told him it was no big deal if he wanted to wait and do it another time.

"When, babe?  If we don't do it tonight it's never gonna' happen."

I said, "We can just do it next week or something."

He said, "Babe, Christmas is next week."

I, literally, paused...then, just doubled over in laughter while driving as a tidal wave of panic ripped through my soul.

How did this happen?  How is it December 16th and I haven't even drafted up my gift spreadsheet, figured out a menu for Christmas Day, wrapped a single gift, or gotten even 5% of the gifts I need to?

What makes it all harder, though, are things like last night.  Sitting in that car for close to 4 hours and not "accomplishing" any of those things stresses me out.  Holiday parties leading up to Christmas stress me out.  Pretty much any event during the week leading up to Christmas stresses me out because all I'm thinking about is how needs to be done.

This morning, I even questioned whether I should go train at CFNE or just stay home and start cranking through my To-Do list.  Luckily, I pulled it together and found one little ounce of reason within my peanut sized brain and drove myself to the 8:30 class like usual.

And then, like a scene out of a rom com, Ben Bergeron walks in with that killer smile and says, "Babe, calm down.  There's nothing to be stressed about."  He just turns his Bergeron magic on and talks me through a game plan that makes it all seem so manageable.  Like it really is no big deal and I have plenty of time to do it all and still kick back with friends and family and have fun.

I swear, if I didn't have that guy to coach me through, literally, every aspect of my life I'd be a total head case...which is scary because I'm already a head case with him settling me down so much.

Just another reason why I am so lucky to be married to the greatest coach of all time.